Happy Six Sunday. Thanks for visiting this week and I’d love to know what you think!! I have another 6 from my latest Novella BDSM WIP. It’s a sequel to the WIP I have been sharing these past many weeks. Last Week: while in Chicago for a conference, Janna gets a chance to enter a BDSM club for the first time. She’s found her escort in Master Simon. Last week he walked her to the playroom door and she walked right in and got an eye full of a couple in mid-scene. This Week: Once again, I’m giving you the very next 6.
The man thrust his cock in and out of her mouth, his control clear. Heat pooled between Jenna’s legs and her breasts tingled with desire. She’d read scenes just like this one. It was beautiful. It was true. She wanted to be that girl.
Will Janna get a taste of what she wants and will it be Master Simon at the helm? Thank you so much for stopping by today!! I’d like to know what you really think of my 6. I need the advice, I’m a newbie and have much to learn. Don’t forget to check out the other Six Sunday authors. Lots of good stuff at Six Sunday and its days are now sadly numbered. I’m not crying. Try to find a new favorite today. happy hunting!
Very sexy! Sounds like a hot read. 🙂
Very nice Six!
Wanted to be that girl, says it all. Especially like this week’s snippet.
Sexy 6! My only suggestion would be to see how it reads without the ‘was’ in this clause: “his control was clear” — I think it makes it sound stronger, but that might just be me 🙂
I dislike the was too, I flirted with “his control is clear” but switched it back. Thanks, Angela, love it when you help me. I’m going to think about this one some more. I’m bound to find a better option.
what about just ‘his control clear”?
Yes, that could work, simple is often better isn’t it.
Love that last line! Nice six!
Very hot six! Loved it.
Oooh, hot! Great six!
S.J. I like the way you worded “…his control clear.” This is much stronger and works with the overall rhythm of the scene. LOVE the last three sentences. Very strong emotion and *snap-snap-snap* rhythm much like the thrusts she’s watching.
I also like the last three sentences. My thoughts were that the short lines echoed what was going on inside her – the building desire and the intense curiosity. Well done!
sexy six! I hope she gets her wish soon 🙂
I agree with Silver. Nice pacing for the scene.
Hot six, and I like her reactions.
I don’t think Master Simon is going to let her have it so easy, so quickly. Love it!!
Oh my oh my! I think I need to ask you if you will be a guest on my site sometime soon! Ping me when this is ready! Delicious.
Thanks, Sophie, that’s sweet of you and I sure will.
Woa! You just never know what your gonna find on Six Sentence Sunday!
*fans face* Sexy stuff! The last line is perfect. 🙂
It sounds like she’s about to be THAT girl! :):)
She’s seeing a whole new side of herself as well as what takes place there, doesn’t she? Great six, S.J.!
Hot scene., I like the way you’re slowly building her anticipation and ours, for what’s going to happen the further she gets into the club, and into her relationship with Simon! Terrific excerpt!
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I love how well you captured this moment!